sKatiric

You might not noticed during this cold winter, probably too busy running as fast as you could from Kaufland to your small flat in Ruzinov  tight in your wool jacket; but now that snow is gone you naturally observed that slovak roads are now full of potholes… oh! I already hear some of you saying  „yeah, there are other priorities“, „Corruption… you know…“ or even „It looks funny, it remind me swiss Emmental“… WRONG

While the NDS (Národná diaľničná spoločnosť) was to busy patching the roads, our skilled experts investigated to understand the origine of this curse, we reveal you the final conclusion.

It come from one movement, one frustration. A feeling that you are worthless and misunderstood, like living a dream… a total inexistence. That is exactly what is feeling the Slovak Green Party (Strana zelených) these past couple of years. Totally lost, without charisma and leadership, the past elections have been a proper disaster. But on this iceberg in the middle of the Capitalist Ocean the White Bear woke up…

As responsible legal citizen, you are aware that next year is going to be election in Slovakia [and you better vote], the Green Party therefor decided to hire some activists and strike all around the country to make it voice hear by the population.

According to our anonymous source “Dark Vegan” the plan was simple: “in few weeks, we wanted to dig as many holes as possible in the roads to make them [the drivers] understand how machines are weak and mother earth our savior.” But the plan got a 2^nd part: “After, we should fill the holes of earth and flowers (…) water and goldfishes for the bigger one”. Still quoted by Dark Vegan, the plan consisted later to change all the public squares into free kitchen garden (potager) ”to make people realize that we exist and can take care of them. After all, we just wanted to get more votes…”

Unfortunately, this utopia was aborted after the 1^st step. “We’ve been caught by the police with 2.330 bags of earth leaving Baumax” whispered Dark Vegan, leaving the road in a sad way.

The great Slovak Government decides after all to fix the roads and invest 8 Million euro for all Slovakia, sending the bill to the Green Part which might never recover from it…